I mostly come across twee as a classification for music (especially for sensitive, relatively subtle music by women--e.g. Camera Obscura). Sometimes the term is meant positively or perhaps a bit defensively (e.g. "what do you expect, it's twee music not John Donne"). But more often the term as used by male music critics is meant derisively. And yes, I do believe there's at least a whiff of patriarchy here (no one as far as I know has labeled Elliot Smith or Nick Drake as twee). But the worst offense for me is designating a complex (usually female) singer / songwriter as twee, e.g. the profoundly introspective Annika Norlin / Hello Saferide / Sakert!. Her lyrics are not quite as apocalyptic as Nico's, but they're often brutally pessimistic (more so than the verses of any male singer songwriters I'm aware of), This song is a dialogue between two people, with a chance for romance that's crushed in the final verse: https://youtu.be/eFV1ERKb1Bw?si=nB5hT_4-_DoKQsLB

Don't let the gentle melody and instrumentation fool you.

Here's another: https://youtu.be/qxshJXLLI-w?si=yBPN2c9GhiMJqe7r ("If this video doesn't make you cry, do you ever cry," to paraphrase Inferno 33).

Speaking of academia, some time in the early 90's I delivered (to no particular success) at a Popular Culture Association convention a paper about Julien Temple's music videos for the Kinks. (Aside: Ray Davies is as sensitive as anyone, but no one ever called him twee, though most listeners mistakenly believe that Village Green Preservation Society is an upbeat tribute to the past and a glorification of nostalgia.

Thank you for this thoughtful non-twee diatribe. It has sent me scurrying into the rabbit hole of my past.