Dostoevsky in “Notes from Underground” suggests that we engage in irrational behavior because we see rational behavior as antithetical to our free choice and we value freedom over self-interest. The post-Russian-revolutionary anti-utopian novelist Zamyatin posited in “We” (the inspiration for the dystopian classics “Brave New World” and “1984”) that we can have happiness or freedom but never both.
When I used to catch mice in those have-a-heart traps to release them into the woods, I noticed that they never touched the food while they were in the trap. You’d think they would figure “Well, since I’m stuck here I may as well eat the damn peanut butter,” but they NEVER did. They put all their energy into struggling to get out of the trap.
Many years ago, someone lamented to me that when a civic group had put up a public bathroom in a disadvantaged community, the users soon destroyed the facility. He couldn’t understand why they would do so, since the bathroom was for their own good. I believe that the destroyers did so because they didn’t want to be defined by the ruling class as bathroom users. Their dignity was more important to them than having a nice toilet.
The Soviet poet Esenin committed suicide in prison and wrote his farewell poem on the wall with his own blood.
I’m not a psychologist, so this is purely speculative. But it seems possible than when people engage in self-destructive behavior (self-mutilation, eating disorders, etc.), they do so not because they’re seeking to avoid anxiety or some other uncomfortable feeling but because they’re trying to feel in control of their lives (cf. Freud’s “Beyond the Pleasure Principle”). I’m not saying that Dostoevsky or Zamyatin are correct that one can’t feel happy and free at the same time, but I do believe that these two goals are often in conflict. Perhaps that conflict can be resolved.
If my hypothesis is valid (in at least some cases), then counseling people engaged in self-destructive behaviors that they would be happier (better off) if they chose instead to confront the negative feelings they experience (a la control theory, cognitive therapy, RET) will not necessarily work in the long term unless you also provide them with a sense of control over their lives (freedom).
